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Testimonials


"I just wanted to let you know, A.J., how helpful your ebooks and audio programs have been to me. Thanks for all the hard work you do and for putting yourself and your own painful experience out there as gifts to those still trying to find their own way."

-- Donald S., U.S.A.

"I totally recommend that anyone who wants to really understand BPD buy A.J. Mahari's ebooks and audio programs. Along with all her stuff on the web they are even more insightful and informative. After purchasing A.J.'s products I did some life coaching with her too. A.J. doesn't just write about BPD, she has lived it. She has lived both sides of it. She is an amazing life coach too. With A.J.'s support I am making my way through the pain and grief of having loved someone with BPD and coming to terms with the reasons for the relationship and my need to let go."

-- Rick Meyers, Scotland

"I would highly recommend A.J. Mahari as life coach especially for those who are non borderline. I worked with A.J. over the course of 6 months as I struggled to end my relationship with my BPD girl friend. A.J. was compassionate, supportive, and so patient with me. I don't think I'd be where I am today without A.J.'s support."

-- Marty Green, Ontario, Canada

Splitting in Borderline Personality - Loved Ones

Splitting in Borderline Personality -  Loved Ones

Price: $22.99

Splitting in Borderline Personality Disorder
- An Understanding for Loved Ones


Loved ones of those with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) often grapple to understand this central manifestation of BPD.

In the face of the reality of the splitting that is a hallmark of BPD, loved ones will benefit from coming to realize what the cycles of idealization and devalution that are the result of the cognitively distorted black-and-white all-or-nothing polarized thinking of those with Borderline Personality Disorder.

It is not possible to rescue someone with BPD from BPD or from the defense mechanism of splitting that is central to BPD. It is important to learn how to cope with the inconsistent reality of the emotional roller coaster of being split by someone with BPD into either and all-good idealized category or an all-bad devalued category.

In this audio program, A.J. Mahari, offers loved ones of those with Borderline Personality Disorder insight and understanding about the central defense mechanism of splitting in BPD and what that means for relationships. Mahari also talks about the importance of loved ones learning to radically accept what borderline splitting really is and means in terms of who the person with BPD in your life really is and/or isn't.

Coming to terms with this understanding and insight will make it clear to you how and why you cannot rescue someone with BPD and what that really means for you and what it means for relationships.

Loved ones of those with BPD need to radically accept and surrender to the reality that they are powerless to effect much desired change and/or healing in their borderline loved ones.

Tracks in This Audio Program include:

Track 1:  The Roots and Anatomy of Borderline Splitting
Track 2:  The Powerlessness of Loved Ones to Rescue a person with BPD
Track 3:  Whose problem is it really? Why does it feel like your fault?
 Track 4: Radical Acceptance of the Powerlessness to Change or Control Borderline Splitting
 Track 5: Splitting and the Non Borderline's Experience of BPD - What About You?

All Audio Programs are in mp3 format. All Ebooks are in PDF format. Audio Programs and Ebooks are available for electronic download only upon purchase.

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Quotes From A.J. Mahari


"We have two worlds and one bridge. That bridge where we can journey toward connection is understanding. Let us all walk this bridge that spans our differences toward its centre with tolerance and an attitude of gratitude for these sacred differences that challenge us to shelter and nurture our humanity with care."

-- A.J. Mahari in her Ebook, "Asperger's Syndrome and Adulthood"

"The inner child in those with BPD, due to the pain that borderlines have abandoned, may well feel overly controlled, abandoned, silenced, and neglected. The borderline's inner child is in tremendous pain and it is also the gateway to the lost self of the borderline."

-- A.J. Mahari in her Audio Program, "From False Self To Authentic Self In BPD - Getting in Touch With the Inner Child"

"If you have Borderline Personality Disorder you have met your one true enemy -- yourself -- namely, your false self to be much more specific. This false self becomes the shadow self experienced by those with BPD. The more you deny the Shadow Self, the more likely it is that you will be blind to your own faults and find those faults in others. Denying the false self, the shadow self, in BPD, only perpetuates your pain and suffering."

-- A.J. Mahari in her Ebook, "The Shadows and Echoes of Self - The False in BPD"