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Testimonials


"I have BPD and I had absolutely no hope for myself until I listened A.J. Mahari's Audio, Finding Hope From the Polarized Negativity of BPD. This and a few other audios I listened to taught me so much. I now have hope. I now understand how I have kept myself trapped in my own borderline chaos as a way of not feeling my pain. I can now change this. I highly recommend others with BPD listen to A.J.'s Audios for Borderlines."

-- Lindy Sinclair, U.S.A.

"A.J., your ebook about Verbal Abuse helped me to realize so much. I needed to know that I was placing myself in danger and that verbal abuse is not something to minimize. I also needed to know that toxic relating isn't love. Thanks so much for writing and making that ebook available."

-- Duke P., Ireland

"I totally recommend that anyone who wants to really understand BPD buy A.J. Mahari's ebooks and audio programs. Along with all her stuff on the web they are even more insightful and informative. After purchasing A.J.'s products I did some life coaching with her too. A.J. doesn't just write about BPD, she has lived it. She has lived both sides of it. She is an amazing life coach too. With A.J.'s support I am making my way through the pain and grief of having loved someone with BPD and coming to terms with the reasons for the relationship and my need to let go."

-- Rick Meyers, Scotland

Splitting in Borderline Personality - Loved Ones

Splitting in Borderline Personality -  Loved Ones

Price: $22.99

Splitting in Borderline Personality Disorder
- An Understanding for Loved Ones


Loved ones of those with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) often grapple to understand this central manifestation of BPD.

In the face of the reality of the splitting that is a hallmark of BPD, loved ones will benefit from coming to realize what the cycles of idealization and devalution that are the result of the cognitively distorted black-and-white all-or-nothing polarized thinking of those with Borderline Personality Disorder.

It is not possible to rescue someone with BPD from BPD or from the defense mechanism of splitting that is central to BPD. It is important to learn how to cope with the inconsistent reality of the emotional roller coaster of being split by someone with BPD into either and all-good idealized category or an all-bad devalued category.

In this audio program, A.J. Mahari, offers loved ones of those with Borderline Personality Disorder insight and understanding about the central defense mechanism of splitting in BPD and what that means for relationships. Mahari also talks about the importance of loved ones learning to radically accept what borderline splitting really is and means in terms of who the person with BPD in your life really is and/or isn't.

Coming to terms with this understanding and insight will make it clear to you how and why you cannot rescue someone with BPD and what that really means for you and what it means for relationships.

Loved ones of those with BPD need to radically accept and surrender to the reality that they are powerless to effect much desired change and/or healing in their borderline loved ones.

Tracks in This Audio Program include:

Track 1:  The Roots and Anatomy of Borderline Splitting
Track 2:  The Powerlessness of Loved Ones to Rescue a person with BPD
Track 3:  Whose problem is it really? Why does it feel like your fault?
 Track 4: Radical Acceptance of the Powerlessness to Change or Control Borderline Splitting
 Track 5: Splitting and the Non Borderline's Experience of BPD - What About You?

All Audio Programs are in mp3 format. All Ebooks are in PDF format. Audio Programs and Ebooks are available for electronic download only upon purchase.

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Quotes From A.J. Mahari


"There are 10 Key Facts at the heart of Borderline Personality Disorder that every non borderline needs to understand. To begin facing the facts of BPD and what it means to the non borderline, you have to first know what the facts really are. Not just the traits that define BPD but the facts of what the experience is and why it is so painful for family members, loved ones, and relationship partners."

-- A.J. Mahari in her Audio Program, "Facing 10 Key Facts About BPD - For Non Borderlines"

"Why is it that we allow so much pain and chaos to be a part of how we define love? What is it that we still need to learn so that we can free ourselves from the burden and the pain of investing in rescuing a borderline? What is it that you still need more awareness about? What are the lessons?"

-- A.J. Mahari in her Ebook, "Full Circle - Lessons For Non Borderlines"

"At the heart of much of what results in relating to someone with BPD is conflict. Are you experiencing an high and/or destructive level of conflict? What is driving that conflict? Is that conflict blocking intimacy and closeness? How do you react to this conflict? Is your own behaviour deteriorating in response to the conflict generated by the borderline in your life? What is it about all of this conflict that you are investing in and why?"

-- A.J. Mahari in her Ebook, "The Other Side of BPD"